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Wednesday, 31 October 2012

Growing Pains : 35 -36 Weeks Pregnant

 

Me

“I feel like someone has attacked my groin with a cricket bat.” I said to my GP. “It really hurts.” I was putting it politely.  Actually, I felt like screaming.  I do feel like screaming. The constant throbbing in my pelvic region these last few weeks has been responsible for a severe lack of sleep, regular tearful interludes and a small fortune being spent on maternity cushions.

Further discussion and a short examination from the GP resulted in a diagnosis of SPD. The GP said she would try to arrange some urgent physiotherapy at the hospital, but with five weeks to go, I did not hold out much hope.  Recent experience has shown that it takes two weeks for a letter to even leave the typing pool at my GP’s surgery.

I took matters into my own hands and on the advice of a friend visited an Osteopath. This relieved the pain somewhat as did the addition of a most becoming maternity belt.  Helpfully, this came with no instructions, yet, it seems that as long as you look like a weight lifter, and said belt is holding up one’s belly with suitable support, it’s doing the job properly. 

Taking weight off the pelvis as much as possible is reputed to be a good thing, so finally, the birthing ball was inflated and has since been put to use (as well as serving a secondary purpose as a giant football).  All these things helped slightly, but the pain was still there, nagging away in the background.  It was therefore a great relief when the community midwife took pity on me last week and put in a separate referral to the physio. Thankfully this seemed to travel at missile speed and resulted in an immediate phone call and an appointment two days later.  My initial visit didn’t cure all ills, but it did help, and I was given some helpful suggestions to deal with the pain ( a pregnant woman always should have a packet of frozen peas in her freezer, apparently), and the reassurance of some ongoing treatment.

I’m trying very hard not to focus on how dreadful it can feel, especially during the long, dark sleepless nights. And certainly, I’m not thinking about how on earth I’m supposed to ‘push through the pain’ to bring my watermelon sized baby into the world.  No, I’m not thinking about that at all. 

Pip

My little man has become a dichotomous little devil in the past few weeks, I am struggling to understand him. On the one hand, he wants lots of cuddles and asks constantly; "Do you love me, Mummy"? I tell my sweet boy I love him so often, I’ve been surprised he’s even felt the need to ask this. But obviously he does.  I’ve also noticed that after a period of improvement, his little hand is now continually creeping back inside my top at every opportunity for a reassuring breast fondle.  I think he senses that change is finally afoot; that the little person is coming.  The hanging of new curtains, the assembly of the cot, the hustle and bustle of preparation are all starting to make EB's pending arrival real for him. Perhaps the prospect of being a big brother is more daunting than I thought.

I’m also finding that he can make the leap from being a sweet little boy to teenage-esque behaviour in one fell swoop.  I’ve witnessed more defiant behaviour in these past couple of weeks than I can ever recall before.   He is normally a good boy, I can’t fathom what it is. Preschool influences?  Insecurities about his forthcoming sibling arriving? Being a 3 year old?  On all counts, it’s exhausting. 

We have the best days when I haul my sorry self into action and make sure we’re doing something; a focused activity or play date. It’s just that I find it so tiring. I feel disappointed with myself, that I’m finding these last few weeks hard, and not making the most of every last precious moment together.   People give you lots of advice about how to deal with introducing your child to the new baby, or, how to cope in those first two weeks, but what I’d really love is some advice on how to entertain your child and keep harmony in the last few weeks of pregnancy, when really, all you want to do is rest.  

How did you manage in those last few weeks?


15 comments:

  1. Now I would like you to go and sit on your birth ball, I 'll put the kettle on, make a cuppa just how you like it (I've remembered the instructions), and I'll fetch those cupcakes I bought from the Hummingbird Bakery ... Oh I wish I could - sounds like you need A LOT of TLC at the moment. SPD sounds very painful - could a spot of acupuncture help as well - you might want to look up on Google whether there are any maternity yoga poses beneficial for relieving the pain of SDP. Sounds like Pip is really sensing the arrival of his new brother and is clambering for your attention - in that respect pregnancy is easier first time around - but with a toddler/little boy to attend to, it makes resting you a lot more challenging. I am guessing you are already doing this - but how about more TV time for Pip, and cuddling up together if that's possible with you on the ball and Pip on the sofa - maybe something like that will give Pip cuddle time and you rest time? Am I stating the obvious here? I hope you get a better night's rest soon! Big hugs! XXX.

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  2. Thanks for the tea and sympathy :0). It is painful. It makes me realise how awful it must be for people who have ongoing illnesses / debilitating pain that they live with day in day out. At least there is an end in sight with this.

    The TV time is a good suggestion, but despite my offering up virtually every Disney film/ dvd ever produced, he isn't interested! I must be the only mother to feel disappointed when her child doesn't want to watch TV! Ironically, a book of bumper nursery rhymes seems to have helped today - it seems he likes trying to recite them with me :0)

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  3. Sorry to read you have been in so much pain, I really hope it eases soon and the treatment helps.

    I can sympathise with you on the tiredness and toddler issues too, sometimes Alex seems fine and excited by it all and then he will make a comment that makes me wonder how it will be in those first days/weeks! He also has days where he behaviour is really hard to deal with, especially when we are with his peers he has about an hour of being a little brat hitting and not sharing, huge paddy and then is fine... not easy to deal with at this stage of pregnancy! I always find it even more frustrating as it usually take me so much effort to actually walk to friends with him. I seem to be having loads of pain in my ribs rather than pelvis which is agony.

    Cbeebies is definitely a big part of our day which I don't really like, otherwise he is very good playing on his own with cars, it just breaks my heart when he keeps asking me to play with him when I am half asleep on the sofa unable to do much. Really hope you feel better soon, with any luck we will both be slightly early (or is that wishful thinking)!! xx

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    1. Thanks for your supportive comment. These last few weeks are tough aren't they? I think I just have to stop feeling guilty about stuff and give in to a few cheeky requests here and there if he wants things. Making life easier for oneself is probably the way to get through it. x

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  4. Oh such a shame that you are experiencing this at the end of your pregnancy. I know other people who have suffered this and I understand it really is enormously painful - sympathy votes for you :( I guess it won't be long now and I hope that's of some comfort. Maybe it's time to slow down and spend as much time as you can with your little man - sounds like he's needing lots of reassurance at the moment, I think that's normal and only to be expected. Do you feel ok about it? I felt very guilty when my second one was born but ultimately, it will enhance his life hugely. His behaviour might continue like this for a little while as he gets used to the idea. x x

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    1. I think it's natural that he might be needing a little reassurance, he has been an only for the past 3.5 years and I guess it may be daunting thinking about sharing us with someone else. I don't feel guilty so much, rather just a little worried about things will pan out. But, like you say, it will enhance his life hugely. At least I hope so! Thanks for your comment. x

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  5. I feel your pain honey, i developed SPD at 22 weeks and was so crippled with it at 30 weeks i was on complete bed rest. I really hope your symptoms ease a little now you have your support belt. I still have SPD (19 months after my sons birth) but i have been told in almost all cases it tends to completely disappear within a few days after having you little one. I hope this is the case for you. i tend to love my hearbal wheat bag (similar to a hotwater bottle) i find it helps no end. :-)

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    1. Gosh, your experience of SPD sounds terrible. I hope you are free of the pain at some point. I am holding onto the hope that it will disappear post birth. Thanks for the hotwater bottle tip. x

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  6. oh honey I really really feel for you. I've had a few friends have that this time round and they told me it was agony! On the plus side I hear it does seem to go almost immediately after birth. I do feel your pain though as I am struggling with my hips and it is so hard, esp with a toddler too! Take as much support and help as you can and try to get as much rest too. *hugs* not long now! x

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    1. I know you feel my pain - literally! Well, actually, I'm sure yours is far worse. Yes, I've heard it goes after the birth. Here's hoping. x

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  7. You are the third of my pregnant friends to be suffering with this! And suffer you do. Just try and remember (hard in the deep of a long, sleepless night) it will all so be worth it.xxx

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    1. Oh, it must be one of those trends...if you've got a pain..it's diagnosed as SPD! Yes, not long to go now...counts down on fingers...x

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  8. You poor thing. Hardly a relaxing build up to the birth. What exactly does the osteopath do to relieve the pain? Surely not a groin massage? Poor Pip must be sensing that change is ahead. Hopefully, it will turn in to excitement at having a playmate rather than him being worried that somebody is coming along to try and take his mum away. Hang in there. Not long to go now x

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    1. I'm no expert on osteopathy but it's about focusing on the core of your body and ensuing total alignment of the muscles. (I think). In terms of what she actually does - lots of massage around the hip area and leg stretches, and a bit of a back massage too - which is actually jolly nice!

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  9. I certainly know how you feel :( I feel so tired and when the baby is moving is such a pain! But not long now honey and we will both have our babies in our arms and all will be better. still we will have sleepless nights from other reasons...
    my daughter is the same cuddly and wants more attention. x

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